The Mis Adventures of Havoc and Black Hayate
by book-chan
Summary: Spoilers for Manga Chp. 34. Havoc brings home a date for dinner. Black Hayate, who Havoc captured for Stir-Fry, escapes.


The Mis-adventures of Havoc and Black Hayate

Spoilers for manga chp. 34 and manga story line.

Characters do not belong to me.  
  
One day Black Hayate found himself left alone in the office with his mortal enemy, Havoc. As Havoc wasn't paying much attention to him, too excited about his date that night with Solaris. Black Hayate sat and tried to decide what his best option was, attack Havoc or escape. Unfortunately for Black Hayate he sat there for too long and his choice was taken from him. Havoc had picked him up by his legs and was holding him at arms length, avoiding all of Black Hayate's attempts to defend himself. "Too bad I wasn't able to get a hold of you earlier. You would have made the perfect dinner for my date tonight. I'll just have to save you for tomorrow then." Havoc whispered maliciously to Black Hayate.  
  
Havoc was successfully able to sneak out of the building with his prize in tow and avoid anything more than a few odd looks on the walk to his apartment. Once in his apartment he stuffed Black Hayate into an empty closet, where Havoc figured he couldn't escape from or cause trouble, while he started working on the meal for his date with the lovely and perfect Solaris. Time flew by for Havoc as he daydreamed and cooked until it was time for his perfect woman to arrive. All during this time Black Hayate was making as large of mess as he could and carefully scratching a hole in the closet door so that he could escape.  
  
An hour later the doorbell rang. Havoc ran to the door, paused to straighten his tie, and then opened it to find the lovely Ms. Solaris there. "Oh Solaris, you look really beautiful tonight. Please do come on in." Havoc told her smoothly. Meanwhile in the closed Black Hayate froze. "What is that nasty smell," he thought to himself. "It smells like death, decay, and green electricity (if green could have a smell). I know I've smelled something like it before but where?" His curiosity getting the better of him, Black Hayate resumed scratching and weakening the closet door with a fierce focus.  
  
"Oh, Havoc what a lovely apartment you have. I see you have some pictures of the people in your office. Who is the adorable chibi, in this picture?" Solaris asked sweetly.  
  
"The chibi? That's the Full Metal Alchemist, Edward Elric. Just don't call him chibi to his face. He has a bit of a complex about his height, especially since that's his younger brother, Al, in the suit of armor. I think his brother is trying to hide another kitten in his armor in that picture" Havoc fondly told Solaris. "They're sort of our office's mascots."  
  
"Hmm." Solaris thought to herself, "So they like small animals, I'll have to do something with that."  
  
At this moment Black Hayate was finally able to break through the door. Unfortunately for him, the breaking of the door was very noisy and he alerted Havoc to his escape. Both Havoc and Solaris went to investigate the crash and found Black Hayate struggling to escape from the pile of wood that he was buried under. Solaris remembering the first part of her plan for the Elric brothers, exclaimed "Oh, is he for me? He's such a cute puppy" and gathered him into her arms. Black Hayate upon being held by the source of that nasty spell reacted rather violently. He trashed about, scratching and yowling, but Solaris held on tight.  
  
Havoc was rather surprised to see such a violent display from Black Hayate, who thanks to Hawkeye's teaching was usually a very well behaved dog. (Except around him but that was to be expected since he kept trying to catch and eat Black Hayate.) "Hey calm down Hayate, Solaris won't hurt you she's the very representative of peace and beauty." Havoc scolded Hayate as he attempted to calm him down. "Maybe you should let him go Solaris, I don't want him to hurt you."  
  
"No, No I can handle him, Havoc." Solaris replied just as Black Hayate got a lucky strike in and caused Envy to lose concentration and his hold on Lust's form.  
  
Havoc recoiled in shock and demanded, "Who are you and what have you done to my beloved Solaris!"  
  
Envy just grinned as he dropped Black Hayate and ran out the door. His tracks were covered by the confusion that Black Hayate caused with his running around and scratching to get rid of that nasty smell. Havoc tried to chase after Envy but wasn't able to since Envy had immediately changed to become someone else. Worried about what had happened to his beloved Solaris since some imposter had impersonated her, Havoc as soon as he had calmed down enough to be coherent called her. He was relieved to find out that she was fine and that the fake Solaris hadn't done anything to hurt her and in fact had arranged the whole date.  
  
To reward Black Hayate for revealing the fake Solaris, Havoc promised him that he would never hunt him again for the purpose of being dinner. This caused Black Hayate great rejoicing because that was one less enemy that he had. After being so close to the fake Solaris though Black Hayate had remembered where he had smelled a similar smell before and nearly fainted from the shock of it. It had been from the Fuher!  
  
Meanwhile back at the Sins House  
  
"Envy, what in the world were you thinking? You could have ruined the whole thing for me and I have a real good thing going with Havoc. I get inside information and get treated out for dinner at the same time." Lust (Solaris) told Envy as she filed her nails. "While Havoc may think with his second brain, other's in his office don't, not even Roy Mustang and if they start putting two and two together we may be in trouble."  
  
"You worry to much Lust, besides I now know the perfect way to hurt the Elric brothers. Right, Gluttony?" Envy cheerfully replied.  
  
"Yummy, Kittens, Puppies and Birds are." Gluttony mumbled as he munched on a bone.


End file.
